Matt 5:8

Knowledge Puffs up but Love builds up.  1 Corinthians 8:1

This goes for so many areas.  We’re do designed to want to always be "right".  My dang pride.  I love being right.  but more than that, I love it when the other person tells me I’m right.  haha. horrible huh?  This challenged me though.  Even when I teach, when I’m listening to others share.  I’m not here to prove anything about myself.  I’m here to only boast of Christ.  And He is LOVE.  He will build up.

These days my prayer has been that I become a woman of integrity.  That requires constant check of motives and intentions.  Sometimes, my thoughts get too loud and I can’t even hear my own heart.  and its hard to really see where my motives and my intentions are.  Sometimes, I learn of my motives/intentions after the act has already been done.  There…  I think, "dang it!" or "Thank you LORD!" But it’s God’s grace that I can learn from those moments.  YET, it’s difficult when its a completely new area of your life God is dealing with.  But it’s time to stop rushing in Esther. It’s time to wait. and just wait… and let God show you what your heart looks like.  It may hurt, it may be a relief. (doubt it) but in that moment, allow his grace to be active in your spirit.

Lord, quiet our thoughts and even our own hearts that we can hear the beating of your heart.  Lead us to a place where our hearts will beat with yours and the

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Summer is coming to an end.

What the heck did I do this summer?

July- taught summer school.

August- went to 2 weeks of workshop. and played with friends.

Even though the workshop was AWESOME and teaching summer school gave me some extra cash to spend this summer (by the way, where the heck did all that money go? why didnt i save? AISH!), it feels like such an unproductive summer.  My spirit isn’t satisfied.  The optimistic side of me says, "Esther, even though you feel unproductive, you did get some things done.  You built up a good curriculum and you got to spend it with people you love".  Yes that is true.  but the other side (dont know what to call it) says, "Man, some people save up their days off from work all year, just to be able to go on a mission trip or something.  Here, you have 2 months every summer.  it comes with your job! How are you using it?". 

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